Here’s a little trivia: 30 is the number of days in four months of the year. It’s the amount of money you’ll need to buy 60 Freddo Frogs, or one-tenth of a Manning Cartell dress. About 30 per cent of public transport commuters are total jerks, and 30 is how many times I usually end up giving in to my urge to eat/drink/buy something expensive after I “stand” my ground.
‘Judgement day’
But, to most of us twentysomethings, the only 30 that really matters is the day on which we wave goodbye to our more carefree years – and confront what’s known to some as “The judgement day”.
And, if the new term for our 30th birthday isn’t scary enough, we’re constantly bombarded by stories of ridiculously successful women who seem to “have it all”, even before they reach the third decade of their lives.
But, pure anxieties aside, is there any logic behind wanting to tick off every single item on our to-do lists before this frightening, self-imposed deadline? the dawning of the age of weariness.
The dawning of the age of weariness
For Danielle, 29, the subject of turning 30 is an inescapable one. “We’ve been so conditioned to see 30 as being a kind of milestone. Even if you don’t necessarily want to think about it in that way, it still forces you to evaluate yourself and ask, ‘Am I where I thought I was going?’”
The recently single government-relations manager has spent the past few months pondering the touchy subject with girlfriends, and admits that she finds the prospect of “settling down” pretty overwhelming.
“We’re a generation that’s had a lot of different choices – we haven’t had to marry the first person we meet out of school, and we now have jobs that change and constantly evolve. On the one hand, there’s a sense of wanting to have permanence – finding the right career path or looking for the one to settle down with.
“But, on the other hand, because I’ve had so much choice in my life, the apprehension for me is this: If I’ve made up my mind, how do I know that I’ve made the right decision?”
Looking deeper
Counsellor and psychotherapist Siobhan Hannan (creativecounsel.com.au) believes Danielle’s experience is a common one for twentysomethings. Hannan explains that, psychologically speaking, the age 30 is what’s known as a “mid-era shift” – where we leave behind our post-adolescent twenties and enter into a new stage called “culminating life”.
“It’s a level where marriage or committed relationships, family and career start to become more important in terms of decision making, and people begin to question where they’re at in those areas,” she says.
“The wonderful thing about the social and economic freedom that women now have is the opportunity to really search for meaning in life. And, in doing so, we’re also learning to understand that any choice we make could mean saying no to something else.”